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Koudee
Posts:91
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| 07/01/2009 2:10 PM |
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I can think of a few things,
Just watch him from a distance hanging out with a few of his friends, just note how he is behaveing, and then walk up and note any change. If you have an effect on him it will show, no matter if he gets quiet, or starts talking louder, you have some sway on him. Unless he totally ignores you, that doesn't exactley mean he Doesn't like you, but it could mean that he does just is really confused and isn't ready for a relationship. Just remember, there is a difference between getting shy when you come around, and compleatley pretending you aren't even there.
Also look for him "squareing up" with you, if he tends to want to point his sholders at you, and face you then that means he is interested. (guys, you should watch for her running her fingers thru her hair)
This one is a little more subtle, and really depends on the kind of guy. If he is more outspoken he might try and talk louder and interupt other guys when he is talking when you are around.
Another thing I have seen some guys do is what I call "Bird'ing a girl", like a bird he looks, then looks away quick, looks, then looks away quick, Lol.
Some guys (Like me) just keep trying to make eye contact with you. Then we base how much you like us on how many times you make eye contact and hold it. (just don't stare all the time, thats when cute turns creepy! lol)
Sometimes its hard because he will share things with you he won't tell other people, but you don't know that so it doesn't seem that special to you.
One of the reasons I like a tomboy is because, well it doesn't have anything to do with "oh they are more like a guy". We are surrounded by guys, and the problem with being friends with another guy is unless you have a lot of time invested in them, most things are always a contest. Its so rare to find a guy who isn't a poser and just levels with you. Thats the great thing about haveing a girlfriend. Its someone you actually get to level with. "Tomboys" just do less of what I see as "overreacting for the sake of being girly~girl". They just seem more "in touch" and availible.
This is a wierd example, but when I ask my GF, "are you on your period" and she just looks at me and says "Na, that was last week" I get this sence of trust. Opposed to asking a "girly girl that and getting "I'm not telling you EWWWW" -whatever.
Is this makeing sence? |
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clare
Posts:932
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| 07/02/2009 5:57 PM |
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| You make perfect sence to me! I llike your blunt honesty and way of putting things. What you say is all true. you're one of those eye holding guys too! Why do guys do that? My BF is like that and I always am the first to break it cuz..idk! I want to know the point of it! |
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clare
Posts:932
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| 07/02/2009 6:03 PM |
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| I forgot to add...about the tomboy stuff, my mom was the perfect girl and she doesn't get how I can be so comfortable with guys she thinks it's flirting when I talk with and openly look a guy in the face. That is the last thing on my mind! I think it's stupid when you talk to someone and they are looking past you instead of at you. So here's my question: what do guys call flirting and when does it go from being ok to not good? Or is it ok? I know what we girls think, but I never asked a guy. |
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Adelynn
Posts:516
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| 07/02/2009 6:19 PM |
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haha I hate the holding the gaze thing!!! it's gets uncomfortable... I mean, I admit that I love that a guy is trying to hold my gaze, and I definitely hate it when people won't look at me when they talk to me or they look past me (ouch...), but I'm on the shy side and I don't want to be the "flirt" and... yeah. But that doesn't mean that I don't like the guy!
I just thought I would add that =] |
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"Angel of Mercy, how did you find me? How did you pick me up again? Angel of Mercy, how did you move me, why am I on my feet again?" -One Republic |
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Koudee
Posts:91
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| 07/02/2009 11:10 PM |
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Oh yea, thats the thing. The guy isn't going (or I'm not going) to look away untill she does. So you are not doing anything wrong by looking away first.
For me, it does two things really, first it lets me know she likes me, from my perspective its kind of romantic for me when she makes eye contact.
The other thing, is that she shows me that she is willing to be assertive with me (she will make and hold eye contact) But won't try to dominate me by waiting for me to break eye contact with her. Each time I repeat that, (make eye contact, she holds, she looks away, or sometimes I look away if I'm doing it a lot in a conversation) I feel like I can trust her more. Like she is giveing me the signal "Its okay, I'm safe to talk to, I'm not going to turn what you are saying to me on you"
Because that is the thing I think scares guys the most. We want to be open with our girl. But that means we give her all the ammunition in the world to tear us to shreads if she wanted to.
Hmmm...when does flirting get to far?
It goes to far when the signal drifts from "hey, I am a female, and I like you", to suggesting something else is avaible.
And, I hate to say it but its a very subtle line.
Talking to us, and being direct with us is what evey guy craves, we love it, and it isn't picked up on as sexual or anything. But, there are two kinds of "Not good" flirting. One, the "totally leading us on, and just playing with us" flirting, that we hate. And the kind of flirting were we just know she wants more than our smile.
Its hard to explain, but I just pick up on it and notice the difference. I can tell when she likes me by the way she looks at me, but the biggest advice I can give you is don't show cleveage. If you want to come across as the "good flirt" type, don't show cleveage. Its just a thing with guys, if I girl is showing it I just automatically lose respect for her, and assume that her flirting ultimitley is going to lead to something else.
And I do have to say that a girls posture has a lot to do with it to. Her body shouldn't be an obsticle for me to avoid. Either with my arms, or my eyes. But I get leery of girls who seem to hang out in doorways were I have to squeeze by them to get out of a room, or the girl who has her chest always around the place were I seem to be reaching.
A girl who is really considerate of her body and the space around it always comes off as more innocent, and I never seem to take her flirting the wrong way.
Oh....dang...I just re-read your post and I totally anwserd your question wrong, I was thinking about the "flirting to not so good" and not the, "what is flirting to guys" part...oh well, might as well keep what I allready wrote! (sorry, this is going to be long)
What is flirting to a guy? Hard one to anwser.
When she sees me and just lets go of a huge smile!
When we have a really good conversation, and she shows real intrest, or concern,
When she asks me how I am doing, or how my day is, or how things are between me and God and she looks like she enjoys asking me and knowing.
But there is something special about it. Me, I can just tell when a girl likes me. I always pick up on the "googley eyes", or she seems to stand closer to me than any other guy in the room.
But I'm also the kind of guy that just calls her up and says "Hey, you really seem to like me? Am I picking up on real signals? because I like you myself" Lol,
-whew- sorry that was so long!
I'm really not that good of a flirt I think, |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 07/02/2009 11:29 PM |
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when does flirting get too far?
It goes too far when the signal drifts from "hey, I am a female, and I like you", to suggesting something else is available.
And, I hate to say it but it's a very subtle line.
There are two kinds of "not good" flirting. One, the "totally leading us on, and just playing with us" flirting, that we hate. And the kind of flirting were we just know she wants more than our smile.
couldn't of said it better myself! re-read that, girls! =] |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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clare
Posts:932
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| 07/03/2009 12:35 AM |
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| You didn't totally answer my question wrong that was really good!! I guess I'm a good flirt though I never would have classified myself even as one. Don't you worry about being much of a flirt. Those guys a jerks! If you like it when a girl shows interest in what you do and is fun and nice to be around-be that way yourself and you'll get far.I didn't know eye contact had so much importance in it! I'm going to have to ask my boyfriend that. You remind me alot of him. |
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Sarah
Posts:2
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| 07/06/2009 6:12 PM |
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| Im speaking 4 myself (a girl) and i don't know about other girl because my personal love language is physical touch, but i love guys who make me feel extra special by putting their arm around me or giving me a hug. it makes me feel so special, loved, complete, secure to feel his protection. i wish that guys would do this more often if at all |
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Koudee
Posts:91
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| 07/10/2009 1:08 AM |
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Yea, A girl I like is the same way sarah, the only problem is that even tho she told me she is the "touchy feeley" type of "love language" she seems to avoid being close to me. She told me in a conversation one time that she was extra carefull around guys, that made sence. But I tried putting my arm around her twice, and instead of adjusting on the couch, so it would have worked, she told me to move my arm, I was confused. I mean, I totally made it obvious about what I was doing lol, so it was a funny thing, but still, I really haven't treid since them. BTW clare! Let me know what you BF says, I'm kind of curious what other guys think too!
I mean, it doesn't mean exactley what I said proababley to every other guy, but for me it definitley sends healthy signals |
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Kaka Fan
Posts:7
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| 07/27/2009 10:48 PM |
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| A boy will look at you a lot. Usually right in the eye for a few seconds. Give a quick smile, and then look away. He also may try and impress you by performing some trick or feat.
If he asks you out, he is showing you that he is interested in you and wants to learn more about you. |
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Adelynn
Posts:516
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| 08/01/2009 7:22 PM |
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| Okay, how do you show a guy that you are interested, without coming off as a total flirt? Keeping eye contact seems to be one... |
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"Angel of Mercy, how did you find me? How did you pick me up again? Angel of Mercy, how did you move me, why am I on my feet again?" -One Republic |
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Koudee
Posts:91
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| 08/02/2009 6:42 AM |
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| Just talk to him, be around him. It will "Click" |
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Koudee
Posts:91
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| 08/02/2009 6:42 AM |
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| Just talk to him, be around him. It will "Click" |
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artyprincess
Posts:224
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| 08/03/2009 3:56 AM |
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I actually don't tend to run my fingers through my hair around guys I like.....
weird!
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God Can. |
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Lindsey
Posts:70
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| 10/04/2009 11:41 AM |
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I think you know if a boy likes you by the way he acts.Like if say he is a really crazy guy and when he is around you he acts all mature and cool.Another way is if he gives you eye contact or if he talks to you alot.Idk if this works with every guy,but every time a guy does this to me the next day his friends will say he likes me or somthing. |
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Rose
Posts:135
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| 10/04/2009 1:53 PM |
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| I have long wavy hair and run my fingers through it alot to make sure its not getting puffy. Haha....I hope every guy that sees me doing that doesn't think I like him. :\ |
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God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of POWER, of LOVE, and of SELF-DISCIPLINE. So do not be afraid to testify about our LORD.
~2 Timothy 1:7-8 |
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Lindsey
Posts:70
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| 10/07/2009 9:00 AM |
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| Yeah,me too.I do that so much.lol |
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