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smartblonde77
Posts:122
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| 06/21/2008 4:20 PM |
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| haha! thats ok! |
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~Krista
it's kinda crazy how time has a way of makein all these memories fade away so if theres only one thing you remember bout me remember that i loved you unconditionally! |
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prettygirl
Posts:46
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| 06/21/2008 5:54 PM |
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| yea, i know how the backstabbing 'friend' thing can be. im friends with sum kids in the grade lower than me and i was like don't anyone tell my sister.. and then one of them turns right around and tells her! then i had another friend who told everyone that i liked this guy (one whom i was friends with) so it was really weird with him for a while so i absolutely hate it when they do that! but since i know how it feels, im careful to not do the same thing and tell anyone's secrets |
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smartblonde77
Posts:122
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| 06/22/2008 9:54 PM |
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| ya its hard and i hate that people can't just be friends with the other people and not you! |
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~Krista
it's kinda crazy how time has a way of makein all these memories fade away so if theres only one thing you remember bout me remember that i loved you unconditionally! |
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katesoph
Posts:4
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| 06/23/2008 6:56 PM |
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To be perfectly honest with you i don't think three years is that long. i know it's still probaly really hard tho. I had so many problems with friends all the time growing up. i have a friend that i have been friends with for almost 4 years and she kinda stabbed me in the back. i dated a guy who ended up being a total jerk and after a few months he asked her out. She knew what he did to me and i didnt think i had to tell her she really shouldnt date him because i knew he would probably be a jerk to her too and just use his words to try to get what he wants. I didnt fall for it, but i knew she wasn't that strong in saying no to that kinda stuff but i basically thought she would know better in knowing what he tried to do that she wouldn't dare to be in that situtation. In the end, she got her heart broken and she got a bad reputation from something she did with him & she still talks about it to this day. We are still friends but we are growing apart because I'm getting closer to God and she is just going backwards. Right now it's really really hard for me to except the fact that we are growing apart & that happened early this year and we recently had a arguement that kinda died off. But than the week after that she asked to sleepover and i told her no because we were busy and my parents told me to tell her that she would sleepover at all through that week. She got really mad at me. I told her i have to obey my parents i can't just not go by there word. she then left me this big message on myspace & i messaged her back in the nicest way possible, but she never responded yet. She said now your hanging out with those "church people" more and you never want to hang out with me. & that wasn't it at all. She also said things like your changing i want my old kate back and so on and so forth. It was pretty ridiculous. Well i told her since it's summer time it may seem like i don't wanna hang out w/ her and since i did see her in school like 24/7 and on the weekends, to her it seems like im avoiding her. Well my point all of that is that sometimes you have those friends who may over react about things and whatever happened with your friend you have to know that she's not the kind of person you wanna be with. She especially is not furthering your relationship with God. & sometimes you just have to let those people go even if it may take time for you to get over losing her. You just have to pray about it. Maybe God will give you a new friend. You just never know.
Hope this helps...
Love,
katesoph |
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Hope139
Posts:23
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| 07/01/2008 10:37 PM |
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| Girls can be brutal, and I think that's why we tend to turn to guys. Somehow they just seem to be more 'solid' or something. More secure. I haven't so much been backstabbed by girls, but I have lost friendships that I thought would last forever. And there's a girl I know who knew I was planning to ask my guy friend to grad, and so she went and asked him first. I've been hurt, but my very best friend is a girl, and I would never give that up. I'm hoping she's the real deal! But it is so nice to have guys you can trust and who you can lean on in difficult times. And they like to be there to offer that strength to us too. It's just how guys are wired. My guy friend is gone now for the summer, and I don't really know if I'll talk to him or see him much, because after summer I'm moving away to Bible College. I definitely had a few good cries over this, but I'm praying and learning to set my sights on God. Because once your eyes are on Him, everything else just falls into place. He's the One person who will never let you down, and I love that so much about Him! |
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May the Lord bless and keep you, may His face shine upon you, and be gracious and give you peace. |
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Provb31woman
Posts:0
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| 09/03/2008 1:34 AM |
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Smartblonde, I would recommend you read Hayley DiMarco's Sexy Girls: How Hot Is Too Hot?
In it she says that wherever you have words printed on your body, that's where guys (and people in general) are going to look. If you're wearing a shirt that has words printed across your chest or some shorts or jeans with words printed across the back, guess where guys are mostly going to be looking? I just felt lead to share that with you. ; D |
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JoJo
Posts:1670
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| 09/03/2008 5:06 AM |
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I think it's just natural for girls to lean towards guys sometimes because they are the strong ones who will hold you up when you need them to. Thats why girls need guys. Like you know how in the Bible it says "It's not right for a man to be alone" (Genesis somewhere...) That basically hints that girls shouldnt be alone either. But yeah, I agree with Courtney too. There are some things you just cant talk to a best guy friend about. (ie stuff that the only guy you'd ever talk to about it, would be your husband.) You need both. I go to my girl friends when I need comfort or someone to cry with etc, and I go to my guy friend when I need someone strong to help me with that particular problem. I talk to guy friends about when I think I like a guy or if that guy might like me. but bear in mind, my guy friend that I'm talking about is someone I'd definitely not consider marrying and he feels the same way about me. We have a strong friendship. If the guy you're wanting to confide "those type of secrets" in, make sure that he doesnt maybe-kinda-like you, or you might hurt his feelings... and guys do get their feelings hurt!
I donno if I really tackled the issue, but I hope this helps anyway... |
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Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo |
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maddiegirl
Posts:210
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| 09/03/2008 7:50 PM |
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| I'd say it works as long as you don't share too much with 'em. Like I don't really think heart-to-heart talks with guy friends is a good idea unless you have some issues or problems to discuss or something. And some things shouldn't be heard by guy ears.But other than that, go 4 it, girl!!! |
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Mirhanda
Posts:14
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| 01/19/2009 1:34 PM |
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| I understand that you need friends that are girls, but at the same time I like having a guy best friend so much more. If something's bothering me, I tell him, but he doesn't allow me to dwell on it, which makes it alot easier to move past this "end of the world" problem that in reality will only last a couple of days. Also, with girls, you can't really have random conversations, but with guys, you can talk about spaghetti for an hour and it makes both of you laugh and enjoy each others company. At least thats the way it is with me. I just think its alot less stressful to have a guy best friend. (: |
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"And I'll be by your side, wherever you fall. In the dead of night, whenever you call. And please don't fight, these hands that are holding you." |
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smartblonde77
Posts:122
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| 01/19/2009 10:35 PM |
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EXXACTLY Mirhanda!!!  |
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~Krista
it's kinda crazy how time has a way of makein all these memories fade away so if theres only one thing you remember bout me remember that i loved you unconditionally! |
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Daughter of Zion
Posts:60
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| 01/28/2009 11:46 AM |
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| Krista, that's actually how i got one of my best friends. i started hanging around him because i liked him, and when my crush ended, i continued to be friends with him. i think it's fine to have guy best friends. i just feel that you should also have at least one best friend who's a girl who you can talk to about stuff that your guy best friends may not want to hear about. I do that many times. whenever i have something girl related that i need to talk to someone about, i talk to my girl friends rather then my guy friends. |
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Because I was created by God and for His glory, I will magnify Him as I respond to His great love. My desire is to make knowing and enjoying God, the passionate pursuit of my life. - Louie Giglio
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Cayla Renae
Posts:58
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| 01/29/2009 12:22 PM |
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I totally agree that it's awesome to have really close guy friends. But like some of you have said, there is definitely a line. I'll just share a little bit of my story...
There was this guy in my school that was a year younger than me, and we got along really well. We would do random things together with our friends, and we both made eachother laugh really hard. He was really caring and protective and overall just a great guy, and I really appreciated that. We hung out alone a lot, but it didn't feel wrong or anything. We didn't touch eachother or do anything we shouldn't do.
We were really tight and he was totally my best friend. We hung out in school, I watched his hockey and volleyball games, and we hung out outside of school all the time. But trouble came, and the pain that followed was crazy.
The whole time we were best friends, people thought we were dating. I didn't let that bother me, because I didn't like him like that, and he never brought it up, so I assumed he didn't like me like that either. I was wrong.
Long story short I broke his heart, and to this day I regret the way I acted towards him. He was like a brother to me, so I treated him like a brother (fighting, bugging, etc.) He didn't see me as a sister, though. And I lost my best friend. It still hurts that we can't be friends like we once were. I apologized and he's forgiven me (we had a good talk), but things just can't be the same.
The moral of my story? Don't hang out with a guy alone unless you have discussed how you see eachother. It's not worth the pain. Oh, and another moral? Never treat guys like brothers (fighting, bugging, etc.) because they see that as flirting. It's not fair to them or to yourself.
Seek God in all your guy relationships, and I promise you that He'll guide you through them! Be patient though... His timing is not our own, but His timing is perfect. Trust God, not your heart.  |
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~created by the King to do good things~ |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 01/30/2009 8:38 AM |
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The moral of my story? Don't hang out with a guy alone unless you have discussed how you see eachother. It's not worth the pain. Oh, and another moral? Never treat guys like brothers (fighting, bugging, etc.) because they see that as flirting. It's not fair to them or to yourself.
Seek God in all your guy relationships, and I promise you that He'll guide you through them! Be patient though... His timing is not our own, but His timing is perfect. Trust God, not your heart.
AAAMMMEEENNN!!! |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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Adelynn
Posts:189
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| 02/13/2009 9:16 AM |
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| wait treating them like I'd treat my brother is flirting??? Obviously if you tease them, but annoying and teasing are different, I thought? |
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"... I will pour out my Spirit upon all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy..." Acts 2.17
What If His People Prayed? |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 02/13/2009 11:26 AM |
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i think cayla meant like, do you wrestle with your brothers? probably. do you hug them randomly (okay, haha, bear with me here, at least imagine it!) and fool around with them like kissing them on the cheek or snuggling with them if your family's like that? i know some sisters who're really comfortable with their older brothers and can sit on the couch with them, leaning on their shoulder or in an embrace, watching a movie. cayla, if i'm totally off-track here, just correct me!
but at least from my perspective, that'd be totally weird if i would act that way to my guy friends (though i don't have a brother). i know some girls DO do that with their guy friends (even christians) and it creeps me out. i would never be able to bring myself to act that way with a guy unless i was in a relationship with him. |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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Locke
Posts:223
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| 02/13/2009 12:44 PM |
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| I don't think that treating a guy like your brother is flirting, but sometimes a guy can see your interaction with him as something more than it really is regardless of what you're doing. |
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It is trifles that make the sum of life. |
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Adelynn
Posts:189
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| 02/13/2009 4:55 PM |
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| aha Emily that makes sense!! haha I was thinking about how I treat my brother... I'm not cruel or distant but we aren't a cuddly family =] no that makes so much more sense!! |
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"... I will pour out my Spirit upon all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy..." Acts 2.17
What If His People Prayed? |
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MyLifeHisWill
Posts:184
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| 02/16/2009 2:06 PM |
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| I LOVE my best guy friend. Actually he's basically my boyfriend now. It wasn't always that way tho. We started out just friends - and were like that for two years. I can tell him ANYTHING!!!! I do agree I've always wanted a girl friend (i had one but she moved away and its not quite the same) but I'm totally freaked with the backstabbing. I've had that happen too many times. Guy friends are great!!! |
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I don't want to just "live" I want to experience life. |
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Cayla Renae
Posts:58
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| 03/13/2009 12:32 PM |
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i think cayla meant like, do you wrestle with your brothers? probably.
Sorry that I didn't keep up with my own post...
When I said treat them like your brother, Yes I meant like wrestling and hugging and stuff (I mean, I don't have a brother, so I wouldn't really know about this kind of stuff) - it sends the wrong message.
The thing with bugging guys is that I can't honestly say that my intent (just having fun and being comfortable) is getting accross as just that - having fun! If you don't know how he views you, you don't know what's going on in his head while you're bugging him.
I hope all this makes sense! If not feel free to challenge me...  |
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~created by the King to do good things~ |
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rebecca306
Posts:1
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| 03/14/2009 12:24 PM |
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I'm new to this, but I couldn't help but reply. I completely agree that "bugging" a guy does not always comes across as innocent fun. And honestly, sometimes I don't mean it as innocent fun. That's wrong, but don't we as girls like it when we tease a guy and he teases us back? It feels different than when you and your girl friends are joking around. I'm not saying that you can't have good guy friends, I have one myself. But, I am saying that you have to be so careful. Never let your guard down if you don't want to end up liking him. With my guy friend, we have an understanding that we don't like each other. We've talked about it and I would never talk about the girly stuff that I can talk about with my girl friends. Good friends are great, but as your sole best friend, guy friends can get a little sketchy.
rebecca306 |
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